Wednesday, July 30, 2014

How to tell a 9 year old about Rape?

What is Rape? And how to tell a 9 year old kid about Rape?
What is Rape? And how to tell a 9 year old kid about Rape?
He just asked, "Bhaia, What is Rape?"

It was bit shocking for me, that how a 9 year old kid can ask such question. But rather than the question, why the hell, he is asking me this question? And where in the hell, he got this thing.

I just simply asked him, "What happened, Harsh. Where you get this thing in your mind?"
Bhaia, I heard it on TV, and when I asked Daddy, he just shouted on me, and said, to solve those math sums, he replied.

Ok tell me in detail, what really happened, I asked.

I was watching the cartoon and then daddy came, he switched on to some news channel, and there was news of girl being raped and people were protesting against school authorities, Harsh.

And then.

I just asked the dad, what is rape? Because, they come up with such news on daily basis, it is something bad. And then, he shouted on me, he asked me to solve those math sums, and when I told him, that I already solved them, he asked me to play outside. Harsh.

I was bit surprised with Mausaji's (Uncle) behaviour, but this is what you can expect from an Indian parent. There is bit hypocrisy left in them, they never talk on such issues and Mausaji was no different from them.

But the question was not that easy, and if not answered properly it can harass a 9-year-old mind.

At that moment, I was feeling same hypocrisy, maybe felt by Mausaji. So just to distract him from the topic, I asked him to wait till the evening, because I also don't know the answer, but let him know after checking it on Internet.

When Ma came from the farmer's market, I just discussed whole thing with Ma, she just told me, She asked me to calm down. It is normal thing with kids, because a kid only ask what he sees, and it is normal. And in present world, you only heard of rapes, molestations and corruption news. So what you can expect from a kid, at some point of time, he will ask that question. And about news channels and newspapers, they materialize this thing so much, that it doesn't look like a serious issue anymore.

Just tell him, "When a person badly touches your private parts, it is called rape."

And when evening came, I just told him, what rape means?

But then he asked me, "Do that person get penalized?"

I just said, "Yes! that person gets penalized with life or death sentence"

He was about to ask something again, but i changed the topic and start asking him some random questions about cricket, school and friends.

And now, I realize intensity of the question and the worthlessness of the answer? The question is way more complex, either you need to ignore or you need to deal with it lot of patience.

After this entire episode of my life, I think, rape is not about physical assault anymore, it is also mental assault. I think, we are raping our kids, women, and good hearted people if not physically but mentally. And I don't know, who to blame, people who do such heinous crimes, or people who have commercialized this whole issue.

Just want to know, what do you think? Or what you will answer if this thing happened to you.

Photo Credit: Rape of Europa


  1. Completely agree. When children question about rape, they are ready to know the answer from a responsible adult rather than hearsay. I love the way this issue was tackled in 'To kill a mockingbird'. I don't know about mental assault, but misinformation is more dangerous than an uncomfortable situation.

    1. Yup, the Mockingbird say about a lot of things in pretty simple manner.

  2. yes, there must be awareness among children.

  3. Rape is a very sensitive issue. You can know my thought on this at:

  4. Yes, this is very difficult to explain to the kids.

  5. I is a sensitive issue which can shatter the innocence of a child. But at the same time it is important to make her aware of the it is never advisable to provide her ant improper or misleading information....rather it's important to handle the situation with tenderness and care...

    1. this is very complex, and yes, you need to handle this issue with lots of patience.